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Meditation On Curmudgeons

Jul 30, 2013
by Caroline Miller
"Progess? Feh!", curmudgeons, Stanley Bing
2 Comments

I admit to having curmudgeon blood in me. I inherited it from my father who always pulled his shirt above his head whenever anyone pointed a camera in his direction. My scrapbook is full of pictures of my father as a headless man.

 Anyone who reads my blogs knows my Achilles heel is technological change. (See blog 7/9/13) I’m all for progress, but change has to make sense and frankly, some of the old fashioned inventions are as good or better than the new ones. I defy anyone to improve upon the paperclip.

 Happily, I am not alone in my curmudgeoness. Stanley Bing warmed the cockles of my surly heart recently in one of his columns. (“Progress? Feh!”, Fortune, July, 2013, pg. 104) There, he casts a glassy eye on much that is meant to pass for improvement. He draws our attention to public toilets, for example. Those automatic sink faucets without handles are a horror. Sometimes they work and sometimes they don’t but they are always followed by the blow dry machines that cut off too soon, forcing people to wipe their hands on their clothes. Emails are another of Bing’s pet peeves. He calls them “a compost heap” of spam. (pg. 104) Smart phones aren’t high on his list, either. How are they a convenience when a boss can reach his employees 24/7, even when they are on vacation?

 If Bing were an inveterate shopper, I’m certain he’d add those electronic machines that read barcodes to his list. Now that salesclerks are becoming extinct, a customer wanting to know the price of a garment must safari throughout the store to find one. I’m not sure how he’d feel about electronic car windows, but I hate them. I keep imagining I’ll drive off a bridge and the electrical system will short, trapping me in my car with the water rising.

Okay, enough of that. I’m making myself nervous. Time to pull my shirt over my head. Oh shoot! The zipper’s stuck. Someone should improve upon those contraptions

unhappy cat

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Courtesy of www.indiaonrent.com)

 

 

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2 Comments
  1. Kitty Miller August 7, 2013 at 12:03 am Reply
    I Completely agree with you Caroline! (Was that father you mentioned a Miller? I am married to one hermetic Miller who will put an actual paper bag over his head in the presence of a camera.) I have railed against fast-moving, "slow-to-imagine-the 'what if' consequences" technologies since faced with my first medical-based computer system in 1985! My dyslexic tendencies also refused to learn to text until this year! AND my best friend has the nick-name "The Curmudgeon Duchess"....I kid you not. Do I qualify for entrance into this exclusive club? It would be a badge of Honor.
    • Caroline Miller August 7, 2013 at 7:57 am Reply
      Yep, my father be a Miller. Must be a nasty gene running wild in the universe. You certainly do qualify for membership in the Curmudgeon society and can wear the badege proudly. As for your friend, "The Curmudgeon Duchess," I hope she's willing to share the title. Now that I've seen it, I'd rather like it for myself. Bah, humbug!

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Contact Caroline at

carolinemiller11@yahoo.com

Portland, Oregon author Caroline Miller had distinguished careers as an educator, union president, elected official and artist/advocate.

Her play, Woman on the Scarlet Beast, was performed at the Post5 Theatre, Portland, OR, January/February 2015

Caroline published a serialized novelette, Marie Eau-Claire, on the website, The Colored Lens.  She also published the story Gustav Pavel,  a parable about ordinary lives, choice and alternate potential, on the website Fixional.co.

Caroline has published four novels

  • Ballet Noir
  • Trompe l’Oeil
  • Gothic Spring
  • Heart Land

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