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Life on the Rubber Chicken Circuit

Apr 24, 2013
by Caroline Miller
Perils of book promotion on the rubber chicken circuit
4 Comments

Today’s blog is personal, anecdotal and a classic example of why a writer needs a sense of humor.

 Yesterday I was a guest speaker at a local service club. My topic was, “Changes in the Publishing Industry.” About 25 people attended. The free lunch was a plate of “rubber” chicken which, being a vegetarian, I didn’t eat.

 During the meeting, a woman asked If I wanted to buy a $10 lottery ticket for a worthy cause. I forked over my money even though the event was one I wasn’t interest in and wouldn’t attend if I won. Soon after, I stood for the pledge of allegiance, listened to numerous group announcements and was then introduced by the host. He admitted he knew nothing me and hadn’t bothered to find out, so I ended up introducing myself.

 Happily, the speech went well. The group was alive with questions and then, after another ten minutes, the party was over. Everyone drifted away. I drove home, a round trip of 60 minutes, having sold just two of my books.

 In sum, I spent $10 on a raffle ticket I didn’t want, used an hour of gas driving back and forth to the meeting place, and lost half a day that otherwise would have been spent writing my next novel. I do not include my preparation time in drafting and practicing the speech. My net gain was $18. That isn’t even minimum wage.

 Want-to-be writers, be warned. Life on the rubber chicken circuit is no picnic.

chicken dinner

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Courtesy of www.wtfprinterest.com)

 

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4 Comments
  1. margaret April 24, 2013 at 7:56 pm Reply
    Funny Caroline! Keep in mind though, how many interested people you engaged with your talk that your presence wouldn't have touched if you were sitting at your desk writing your next novel. It's all accumulating credits for sure.
    • Caroline Miller April 25, 2013 at 8:13 am Reply
      You're right to look on the bright side Margaret. And I did come out $18.00 to the good. As for accumulating credits, at the rate I'm going I doubt I'll live long enough to build more than a small ant hill -- not the kind you have in Australia but the kind we have here which are punty. Still, I had fun, the audience had fun. It's a good life. Thanks for reminding me of that.
  2. tuna cole April 28, 2013 at 3:10 pm Reply
    "Paying one's dues" can be a slow, seemingly thankless grind, to be sure. But $18 "not even minimum wage"? Surely you misspoke...
    • Caroline Miller April 29, 2013 at 6:20 am Reply
      No, I didn't mispeak but was nclear. $18 an hour for all the hours I put into the presentation, the travel time and giving the speech, more than 20 hours work for $18 would put my compensation in the minus column. Always was poor at math. Thank you for helping me clarify the point.

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Contact Caroline at

carolinemiller11@yahoo.com

Portland, Oregon author Caroline Miller had distinguished careers as an educator, union president, elected official and artist/advocate.

Her play, Woman on the Scarlet Beast, was performed at the Post5 Theatre, Portland, OR, January/February 2015

Caroline published a serialized novelette, Marie Eau-Claire, on the website, The Colored Lens.  She also published the story Gustav Pavel,  a parable about ordinary lives, choice and alternate potential, on the website Fixional.co.

Caroline has published five novels

  • Getting Lost To Find Home
  • Ballet Noir
  • Trompe l’Oeil
  • Gothic Spring
  • Heart Land

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